Welcome to the Dom Sub Living Podcast, your go-to kinky resource, so you can get out of the vanilla rut, become the best Dominant or submissive you can be, and make BDSM a lifestyle. Explore the many facets of the Dom/sub lifestyle and gain practical insights and tips to enhance your journey. Your host, Alesandra Madison, is a renowned BDSM educator, empowering individuals and couples to embrace their sensual selves. As the creator of Domsubliving.com, Alesandra promotes sex education, healt ...
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Impact Play 101: 5 Beginner-Friendly Ideas to Try Now
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#061 Curious about impact play but don’t know where to start? Or maybe you’re worried about doing it wrong? Don’t stress—you’re in the right place. In this episode, we'll guide you through 5 easy, beginner-friendly impact play ideas that are safe, fun, and perfect for building your skills. We’ll cover everything from hands-only techniques to using …
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Exploring Your Kinky Identity: BDSM Roles Beyond Dom and Sub
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#060 What's your role in the world of BDSM? Let's dive in and find out! Join us as we break down the ins and outs of BDSM roles. From Dominants and submissives to fun niche roles like primal play and rope bondage, there's something for everyone. Hear personal stories, get tips on discovering your role, and learn how to make BDSM uniquely yours. Whe…
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Service-Oriented BDSM: Elevate Your Dom/sub Dynamic
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#059 How do small, intentional acts of service transform a relationship? Join us as we dive into balancing parenthood, health, and wellness, all while serving from a place of strength. We've got tips on setting up intimate scenes, starting small with acts of service, and creating meaningful rituals. From helping with morning routines to mindful tas…
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10 Dom/sub Ideas for Public Spaces – No One Will Notice!
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#058 Worried about keeping your Dom/sub dynamic alive in public without drawing attention We've got you covered! Join us as we dive into 10 subtle and kinky ideas for maintaining your D/s connection in everyday settings. Learn creative tips from secret hand signals to special dress codes, ensuring your dynamic stays strong and thrilling, even at fa…
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Dom Drop 101: Support Strategies Every Sub Should Know
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#057 Even Dominants need a break sometimes. In this eye-opening episode of the Dom Sub Living Podcast, we're breaking down the concept of "Dom drop" and its impact on the dynamic. Learn how to recognize the signs, offer tailored aftercare, and support your Dominant through emotional crashes. Discover tips to encourage rest, conduct meaningful check…
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Punishment or Play? How to Know the Difference in BDSM
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#056 How do you know if a spanking is all fun and games or a real punishment? Mixing them up can lead to confusion and hurt feelings, even if everything's consensual! In this episode, we're breaking down the key differences between punishments and funishments. We’re talking about setting clear intentions, avoiding mixed signals, and keeping your ki…
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Frightening Fantasies: Exploring Darker Desires in BDSM
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#055 Have you ever had a fantasy that scares you? Maybe it feels too intense, or you're worried it says something bad about you. Darker desires are more common than you think, and they can be safely explored with the right tools and communication. In this episode, we're diving into the psychology behind frightening fantasies like consensual non-con…
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Why Kink and Politics Can’t Be Separated and What It Means for You
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#054: Is kink political? Tune in as we get real about the challenges facing the kink community today. From censorship on social media to how obscenity laws mess with our lives, we're covering it all. Learn about the fight for inclusive spaces, the valuable work of kink advocacy groups, and why your vote really matters. We also dive into the interse…
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Submissive Training Secrets: Mastering Your Role in the BDSM Lifestyle
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#053 What drives a submissive to grow and reach their fullest potential? It's all in the training. Join us in this episode as we break down how to create personalized training plans that fit your unique dynamic. We’ll talk about why protocols need purpose, how patience and consistency are your best friends, and the quirky yet helpful "car analogy" …
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How to Build BDSM Protocols to Deepen Your D/s Relationship
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#052 Can serving coffee really make your Dom/sub dynamic stronger? You bet it can! Join us as we break down the ins and outs of using protocols to add depth to your relationship. Find out how small steps like kneeling and wearing a day collar can make a big difference without becoming overwhelming. We also share practical tips like doing morning ch…
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Is BDSM Compatible with Christianity? The Surprising Truth
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#051 Can you be a devoted Christian and still enjoy BDSM? In this eye-opening episode, we're uncovering how Christian teachings on love, respect, and mutual authority can blend seamlessly with BDSM practices. We open up about our own journey of mixing faith and kink, bust common myths, and talk about the importance of exploring your desires. Tune i…
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BDSM Scene Structure 101: Step-by-Step from Start to Finish
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#050 Want to make your wildest fantasies come true? In this episode, we're diving deep into the intricacies of creating compelling BDSM scenes. Learn how to blend pleasure, restraint, and pain, set the perfect mood, maintain communication, and ensure smooth improvisation. Discover essential aftercare routines and tales of personal experiences that …
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Feeling Lost in Kink? Here’s How to Find Your Unique BDSM Path
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#049 Ever feel lost in your kink journey, like everyone else has it all figured out but you? We're diving into the complexities of navigating the kink lifestyle. Discover how to build confidence through self-exploration, find a supportive community, and safely explore your kinks. We'll also share personal stories, tips for mastering communication, …
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Vetting a Submissive? Avoid These 5 Red Flags Before You Commit
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#048 Is your potential sub truly compatible, or a red flag waiting to happen? We're diving into the crucial process of vetting a submissive, shedding light on the often overlooked but vital steps. Discover five key red flags like inconsistency and disrespect for boundaries, and why proactive sub behavior and core values alignment are paramount. Lea…
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Topping from the Bottom? Stop Sabotaging Your D/s Dynamic Now!
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#047 Are you unknowingly wrecking your D/s dynamic? We're diving deep into the concept of topping from the bottom and how this subtle power shift can sabotage your BDSM relationship. Learn what it is, why it happens, and practical solutions to prevent it. From open communication to setting clear boundaries, join us as we uncover how to maintain a h…
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How to Vet a Dominant: Key Questions and Red Flags to Look For
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#046 Worried about finding a Dominant who really respects your boundaries? Let’s make sure you’re in good hands. In this episode, we're breaking down the essentials of vetting a Dom. We’re talking key questions to ask, red flags to watch out for, and practical safety hacks to keep you protected. Plus, we're sharing some real-life stories and even a…
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Understanding Brats in BDSM: Embrace the Fun and Challenge!
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#045 Brats are having a moment right now, but have you ever wondered why some people love bratting in BDSM while others find it frustrating? In this episode, we're diving deep into the world of brats in the kink lifestyle. Discover the playful psychology behind bratty behavior, key distinctions between playful and disrespectful bratting, and practi…
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Maintenance Spankings: 5 Things You Need to Know
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#044 Ever wondered how to keep the spark alive in a Dom/Sub relationship and keep bratty behavior at bay? Let’s talk about maintenance spankings! In this episode, we're delving into the world of maintenance spankings. We discuss their purpose, benefits, and how they differ from punishment spankings. Learn why consistency and routine are crucial, an…
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The BDSM Olympics: Top 10 Kinky Skills Revealed
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#043 Ever wondered what it would be like to compete in a BDSM Olympics? Join us as we dive into the thrilling concept of a BDSM Olympics, exploring impact play, sensory deprivation, and the importance of safety and communication in Doom/sub dynamics. Learn about top kinky skills, like wax play, medical play, and electro play, and discover how to ta…
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4 Ways to Build Trust in a Dom/sub Relationship
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#042 Trust Issues in Your Dom Sub Relationship? Here's How to Fix Them! Trust is the bedrock of any strong D/s dynamic. In this episode we're discussing essential principles for building and maintaining trust. Hear personal experiences and actionable tips to help strengthen trust and create a more fulfilling relationship. Don't miss the insights on…
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From BDSM Newbie to Expert: Navigating the Stages of Your D/s Journey
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#041 Ever feel overwhelmed by the world of BDSM and don't know where to start? Or maybe you've dipped your toes in and need some tips to level up your game? This episode's for you! We're breaking down everything from newbie basics to expert moves, making it super easy to follow. You'll get the lowdown on building skills, setting up boundaries, and …
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How to Balance a 24/7 BDSM Dynamic with Vanilla Life
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#040 Ever feel like you're juggling your BDSM dynamic with your everyday vanilla life? Join host, Alesandra, as she shares her journey to harmonize work and family with BDSM desires. In this episode, learn practical tips and strategies such as setting boundaries, scheduling BDSM activities, and integrating subtle rituals into daily life. Discover h…
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Perfectionism in BDSM as a Dom or Sub
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#039: "Perfection is the enemy of progress in your BDSM journey." Join host, Alesandra, as she opens up about her personal struggle with perfectionism as a sub and its impact on her relationship. Discover how the pressure to be perfect can hold both Doms and subs back and learn practical tips to embrace imperfection, set realistic goals, and celebr…
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Navigating BDSM with a Disability: Empowering Your Journey
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#038: Can someone with a disability still live the BDSM lifestyle to the full? In this episode, we're diving deep into the world of disability, chronic illness, and kink. With growing awareness around health issues, we're sharing personal stories, practical tips, and the importance of inclusivity. Discover how communication, consent, and specialize…
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BDSM Degradation & Humiliation Kink: Ideas & Tips
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#037: Want to dive into degradation and humiliation with your partner but afraid you'll cross the line? Let's navigate these intense and thrilling aspects safely and confidently. In this episode, we're diving into the world of degradation and humiliation within BDSM. Learn the differences between degradation and humiliation, explore beginner to adv…
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Kink and Kids: DOs and DON'Ts for D/s Parents
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#036: How do you balance being a parent and participating in a BDSM dynamic? In this episode, we're uncovering the delicate balance between parental duties and maintaining a Dom/sub relationship. Learn how to segregate roles, keep privacy intact, and educate your kids about consent and respect. Discover practical tips for managing impact scene nois…
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BDSM Q&A: Fresh Ideas, Avoiding Burnout, Navigating DMs
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Ever wondered how to keep your kink life fresh and exciting? Let's uncover some secrets together! In this AMA episode, we're tackling your burning questions about scene improvement, avoiding burnout, and maintaining excitement in long-term BDSM relationships. Alesandra shares personal insights from her D/s partnership with Jay, tips on creating rit…
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Bisexual Submissive in a BDSM Dynamic: My Story
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#034: How do you balance being bi and submissive? In this episode, we're getting real about the ups and downs of being a bisexual sub while having a Dominant, male partner. We're tackling labels, biphobia, and how the BDSM and LGBTQ+ communities intersect. Plus, find out how a bi sub navigates her non-binary attractions and battles stereotypes. Don…
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SSC vs. RACK vs. PRICK: Which Safety Protocol Fits You?
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#033: Is 'Safe, Sane, Consensual' still the gold standard in BDSM, or is it time for a change? We're diving into the ins and outs of communication in BDSM, the buzz around acronyms like RACK, PRICK, and CCCC, and why consent is non-negotiable. We're sharing our thoughts on using "ethical" and the importance of being informed about BDSM practices. P…
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BDSM in your 40s, 50s, and Beyond!
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#032: Here's why it's never too late to jumpstart your sex life and master the BDSM lifestyle. Too many older kinksters worry that they're too late to the game, are discouraged by their age, or think they're too far behind to ever catch up. The truth is age is just a number, and you're never too old to be your best Dom or sub self! Listen in and ge…
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Age Gaps in BDSM Relationships
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#031: Is age really just a number? Join host Alesandra as she delves into the complexities of age gap relationships within BDSM. This episode uncovers myths, explores challenges, and celebrates the unique benefits of significant age differences in Dom/sub relationships. Key topics include consent legality, power dynamics, and personal anecdotes fro…
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BDSM's Role in My Mental Health Journey
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#030: Struggling with your mental health? You're definitely not in this alone. Your host, Alesandra, has been there and is now sharing her raw take on finding balance with help from the world of BDSM. This chat's packed with real talk about coping mechanisms, the power of a structured dynamic, and even how Alesandra found unexpected support with ke…
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Exploring the Depths of BDSM with Just Press Foreplay
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Ready to unravel the intricacies of BDSM and discover the profound connection it cultivates? Listen in as Suzii from Just Press Foreplay interviews Alesandra in this raw episode. Unpack the complexities of consent, communication, and care in BDSM. From boundary negotiations to the spiritual intertwining of dominance and submission, Alesandra and Su…
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4 Ways to Be a Better Submissive
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Are you the sub you want to be? Dive into the 4 key pillars that separate a good sub from a great one in this episode. Join host Alesandra to uncover how submissives can better serve their Dominants. This episode is packed with actionable tips for enhancing your submission in relationships. To elevate your submission even more, be sure to grab our …
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Why You Need a BDSM Mentor
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#027: Ever felt lost in your BDSM journey? Dive deep with Alesandra as she uncovers the red and green flags in seeking a BDSM mentor. From identifying qualities of a credible guide to the transformative power of mentorship, Alesandra offers practical advice on navigating the lifestyle with confidence, and offers options for personalized mentorship.…
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Connecting with the Kink Community
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#026: Are you curious about joining the kink community? Join Alesandra as she uncovers how to find kinky friends at local munches and dungeons. Discover intimate gathering spots, learn BDSM etiquette, and find out how larger events foster connections. This is your personal invitation to learn how to engage with the BDSM community for ongoing educat…
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Foolproof BDSM Advice
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#025: Ever heard some "foolish" BDSM tips? Let's clear the air! Join host Alesandra as she debunks dangerous advice and delves into the murky waters of BDSM myths. We cover the importance of personal limits, dispel the notion of power imbalance, and reject gatekeeping in kink practices. Listen in and discover why there's no 'one-size-fits-all' in D…
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What No One Tells You About Dom/Sub Relationships
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#024: Ever wondered what BDSM is REALLY like, beyond the dungeon drama? Alesandra's here to spill the tea. She's peeling back the curtains on the nitty-gritty of power play. Think honest chats about trust, tricky emotions, and managing kinks while juggling real life. Jump into this raw conversation about love, leather, and everything in between. Cl…
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Surprising Signs You Might Be a Switch
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#023: Ever wonder if you're a switch in BDSM? Get the juicy details on embracing both dominance and submission! Listen as host Alesandra breaks down the ins and outs of being a switch in the BDSM community, debunks misconceptions, and shares signs that might point to a flair for both dominance and submission. Don't miss out on embracing your person…
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4 Ways to Be a Better Dominant
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#022: Ready to elevate your dominance game? Dive into the 4 key pillars that separate a good Dom from a great one in this episode. Join host Alesandra to uncover how Doms can enhance their relationships. this episode is packed with actionable tips for enhancing your dominance in relationships. To elevate your dominance game even more, be sure to gr…
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The Truth about BDSM Tradwives
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#021: We're diving into the world of Tradwife dynamics in relation to BDSM, as we uncover their similarities and differences. Join host Alesandra and she goes deep into the heart of the Tradwives lifestyle, discussing submission, empowerment, communication, and consent. Discover the appeal of 1950's submissive kink, and the importance of informed a…
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Unlock Daily Consistency in Your BDSM Relationship with These Tricks
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#020: Do you struggle with maintaining daily intensity in your BDSM relationship? Join Alesandra as she dives deep into unlocking the secrets of daily consistency in Dom/sub dynamics. As a full-time collared submissive and a mom of two, Alesandra discusses practical tips for integrating BDSM into daily life. Strengthen your Dom/sub relationship and…
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5 Newbie Mistakes I Didn't Expect in My BDSM Journey
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#019: Discover the 5 crucial newbie mistakes in BDSM as host Alesandra reveals her embarrassing but invaluable experiences in this candid episode. Listen in as she walks through her real-life blunders, and bares it all to help fellow enthusiasts avoid these common mistakes. These insights are a must for any newbie (or veteran) in the BDSM scene. – …
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Helping Your Partner Embrace the BDSM Lifestyle
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#018: Having trouble getting your partner on board with BDSM? Let's figure out how to make it a joint adventure filled with excitement and fulfillment! Your host, Alesandra, dives into the challenges of getting your partner interested in BDSM, highlighting the importance of communication, mutual benefits, and taking it slow. She also emphasizes the…
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#017: Are you struggling to find a legitimate Dom or sub partner? In this episode, we dive into the secrets of navigating the BDSM dating scene. Alesandra provides guidance on finding a genuine partner, addressing past relationships, creating a wish list, vetting potential partners, and authentically presenting yourself. She also shares more about …
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Overcoming Dom/sub Mindset Struggles with Leann Herron
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#016: How did this sub go from a sexless marriage to embracing the BDSM lifestyle? Leann Herron's journey is nothing short of inspiring. Leann is a kink-informed relationship coach, and also a Dom Sub Living student! On this episode she dishes with Alesandra on safe kink exploration, overcoming mindset hurdles, and practical tips for mastering the …
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Our BIGGEST Announcement Yet
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#015: This is huge. Brace yourself because I'm dropping a bombshell, and it's a game-changer! Introducing our All-Access Pass – the ultimate combo of community-powered BDSM education and access to all our courses at your own pace. Connect with fellow kinksters on the same journey. Our killer courses have led thousands to success as a Dom or sub, an…
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5 Ways to Master Long-Distance D/s Relationships
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#014: Strengthen your long-distance BDSM relationship with our expert tips! Join host Alesandra as she shares her experience and offers valuable hacks to make your long-distance dynamic a success. She discusses punishments, virtual scenes, and more! Follow along with our free worksheets so you can create your own, personalized LDR action plan. – Gr…
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New BDSM Trends and Predictions for 2024
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#013: Stay ahead of the curve with our latest BDSM insights! As the kink community evolves, what new trends are emerging? Listen as host Alesandra discusses exciting trends in the community and offers valuable predictions for the upcoming year. Staying informed on the evolving trends in BDSM will help you on your journey to becoming the best Dom or…
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The Good, Bad, and Ugly of my 2023
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#012: Join Alesandra as she reflects on the good, the bad, and the ugly moments of her life, love, and BDSM journey in this candid and emotional episode. Listen as she shares the challenges she and her partner have overcome, including health struggles, relationship dynamics, and the impact of long-distance work commitments. She also opens up about …
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