True Tea is a podcast by Kat Blaque, a woman sitting at the intersections of transness, blackness, kink, sex positivity and polyamory. In this podcast, she answers questions asked about the nuances of her life and also poses questions to her audience with a desire to learn. Sometimes she's right, sometimes she's wrong, but either way she's honest and that's the True Tea.
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Parenthood when You're Transgender
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19:36
Based on a previous discussion we had, I thought I'd speak about my desires to have or not have children and how it relates to my transness or doesn't. As an adoptee, I have some pretty strong feelings about adoption and being ready when you have children. I thought I'd share my thoughts on having children and open the question up to my audience. S…
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[Call-in Show] Polyamorous Folks Discuss Discrimination and Queer Identity
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This month I asked if being polyamorous makes someone part of the queer commuity and I got a lot of very surprising answers to this question on this month's show. A grad student working on his thesis tells me a few stories of the discrimination his cis heterosexual subjects experienced while being openly polyamorous. A person from Utah shares some …
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Does Being Polyamorous Make You Queer?
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As a polyamorous person who some see as queer, I figured I'd share my thoughts about whether or not being polyamorous on its own defines you as queer. I have...complex and honestly conflicting feelings about this. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/katblaque…
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[Call-in Show] How do you feel about the word Queer?
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After sharing my thoughts, I thought I would ask my audience how they felt about the term queer. For some it's a word that's too vague to speak to their experiences, and for other, the vagueness is the appeal. Full Unedited episode: https://www.patreon.com/posts/february-call-in-78430732 Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by…
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Why I'd Never Describe Myself as "Queer"
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"Queer" is a term I've always had a very complex relationship with. On one hand, I respect that as a transgender woman, I will always be seen by as outside of heterosexist norms by many. Yet it's hard for me to reconcile the reality of my lived experience where people tend to assume I'm a cis woman and by proxy, heterosexual. I've lived most of my …
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Artists, Researchers and Art Theorists Discuss AI Art
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This month, we discussed AI Art and its ethics. In this call-in show, I spoke to several different people who all offered different perspectives on AI art and its impact. We had a great conversation about how it's impacting upcoming artists and asked the question "how long have artists been able to sustain themselves as they currently do". Are the …
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An Argument Against AI Art
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A few days ago, I found an acquaintance of mine trying to sell AI portraits of popular characters in baby form. His only challenge was plugging in specific descriptions of the images he wanted and a computer generated images for him to sell and increase his reach. Since seeing that one post, he's made several more and produced more "art" in a short…
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[Call-in Show] Transitioning Young, Detransitioning and The Complexities of Both
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This month, we're having a conversation about how young is too young to be transgender. It's a rather rhetorical question because obviously anyone at any age can identify or understand themselves as transgender, but when it comes to trans care, there are some rather complicated realities that are often brushed under the rug in this conversation in …
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How Young is Too Young To Be Transgender?
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With increased antagonism towards transgender children receiving care, I thought it would be a good idea to have an open conversation about the benefits of transitioning young; with a few caveats based on my own experiencing transitioning young. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com…
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[Call-In Show] Asexuals Clarify Demisexuality
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In this month's podcast episode, I asked the question: Am I demisexual or do I just have standards? In this call-in show, people who identify as demi and ace speak to me about the difference between these two and the complexities of not exactly experiencing sexual attraction the way many of us do. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help sup…
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Am I "Demisexual" or Do I Just Have Standards?
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Despite being overtly sex positive, I'm not really a person who jumps into the bed with people and for that reason, some people have suggested that I may be demisexual. For me, this is strange because I think most people tend not to rush into sex, but maybe hook up culture has made that feeling rare enough that it deserves its own sexual designatio…
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[Call-In Show] "Pretty Privilege: Misogyny, Colorism/Featurism and Colonization?
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We continue our conversation about "pretty privilege", wether it exists and if the concept can be differentiated from other isms. We hear from a white transgender man who experienced "pretty privilege", a South Asian woman who grew up with a thinner, lighter skin sibling who was always treated better than her and a man from Brazil who speaks about …
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Is it "Pretty Privilege" or Just Racism?
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The concept of "pretty privilege" is an interesting one for me. On one hand, I don't doubt it's existence and frankly, I've benefited from it. However, quite frequently. when I unpack what's considered attractive in the United States, it seems hard to differentiate it from other isms like racism, fatphobia and ableism. So I question if it is truly …
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[Call-In Show] Queer Folks and Teachers Discuss the Don't Say The Gay Bill
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I hosted a call-in show to discuss the complexities around the Don't Say The Gay bill in Florida and the concept of "grooming". Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/katblaqueKat Blaque
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"Grooming" and Not Saying The Gay
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With growing antagonism towards queer kids and educators, there's a risk of alienation and, the subsequent grooming that typically happens when queer kids seek out support and find predators instead. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/katblaque…
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Is It Transphobic To Sexually/Romantically Reject a Trans Person?
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It seems like we can never discuss transgender people's existence without discussing who they're sexually available to. One of the most popular bits of discourse around this issue is whether or not someone is transphobic for not being sexually or romantically interested in a transgender person. For me, the question is an interesting one as a person…
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[Call-In Show] Formerly Hypersexual Survivors Discuss How They Were Confronted At the Height of Their Hypersexuality
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As we've been discussing, hypersexuality is a pretty common reaction to sexual violence and it's also pretty commonly misunderstood. In this episode, I ask my audience the question whether or not they would have been receptive to someone trying to call them out for their hypersexuality at the height of it. In this episode, we speak to people of var…
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How To Help Someone Engaging in Hypersexuality as Self Harm
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In the continued discussions we've been having around hypersexuality, one of the things I mentioned was that I would have appreciated someone stopping me or calling me out for what I was doing. However, the reality is I would have been incredibly defensive to the point where I wouldn't at all respond positively to someone who wasn't a parent trying…
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[Call-In Show] New York Lesbians Discuss Whether Trans Women Are Shutting Down Lesbian Bars
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In the podcast last week, I spoke about a comment I got from a New Yorker who said that lesbian bars in NY were so full of trans women that cis women who didn't want to date them were forced to go underground in order to meet with each other. As a straight person, this sounded strange, but anything is possible. So I opened up my lines to Lesbians a…
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Lesbians, Trans Women and "Transphobia"?
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Transphobia and dating are subjects that come up pretty frequently and one of the most intense debates is about whether or not lesbians are transphobic for not wanting to sleep with trans women. I dont personally think so, but im fairly used to women pursuing me romantically. If we listened to this discourse, we'd believe that never happened but I …
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[Call-In Show] Various Genders Discuss Gendered Pricing
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In this episode of the call-in, we speak to a few people of various genders and they give their perspective on gendered pricing structures at events. We speak to a trans man who once enjoyed getting freebees for being seen as a woman, a post op trans woman about her own experiences and two cis women about their own experiences in these practices in…
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From clubs to kink parties, I discuss the concept of "women get in free" in the midst of a reckoning in the LA area where some of these places are being shut down because of sexual assault allegations. They often say when you get in for free, you're the product. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http:…
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[Call-In Show] Survivors Discuss Hypersexuality After Sexual Violence
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Hypersexuality is a common response to sexual violence, but many folks would assume the opposite. In this call in show I open the floor up to a wider range of people to discuss their own experiences with hypersexuality after sexual violence. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/kat…
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Hypersexuality After Sexual Violence
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When you've been assaulted, the assumption is frequently that you would become more modest, less sexual and very protective of who you allow into your physical space. This idea is often predicated on the idea that sexual violence only occurs when someone seems receptive to it. This is an obvious fallacy, but the hypersexual response to assault is s…
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[Call-In Show] Black Queer Folk Discuss The Complications of Black Love
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When you're black, you're often raised with this idea of black love. My parents directly told me not to date outside of my race. However, as a trans woman, I've found this to be pretty complex and I discussed that in the last episode. Now I open the floor to folks who have had similar, but also different experiences pursuing black love when you're …
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Dating Black Men When You're a Black Trans Woman
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As someone with several long term relationships with white men, I'm often criticized for not having relationships with black men. This has often put me into a position where I'm having to measure if I'm willing to stick to my general standard of a man who wants to claim me, or shift my standards "for the cause". It seems as though some people would…
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[Call-In Show] The Spectrum Responds to Crossdressing/Sissification and Misogyny
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This week, our call in show is all across the board. We speak to bisexual black men who've slept with Crossdressers, Dfab NB folks who've dealt with it head on and a transgender man who points out the fact that part of the problem is that submission is very rarely framed as masculine. So let's dive in with an open mind! Support the show If you enjo…
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Crossdressers, Sissies and Misogyny
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As a transgender woman, I'm frequently put in positions where I've been approached by sissies or crossdressers. While these two fetishes aren't exactly the same, I do find that they tend to relate in terms of how many men practice these fetishes. When femininity is framed as a shameful, negative, disgusting thing and men fetishize that, its hard fo…
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[Call-in] Black Women Discuss Race Play
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Black Women call in and tell me about their experiences with Race Play! From a woman who almost joined a Plantation manned by a white master, to a sex worker who charges extra for race play, these perspectives are fascinating and shed light on how race play impact black women, especially sex positive ones. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast,…
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[Call-In Show] Black Men Discuss Race Play
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In my original podcast, I said that black men quite frequently don't seem bothered by Race Play and I was lucky enough to have several black men call in and give me their perspectives. Some who boldly embrace race play, others who roundly reject it. Both straight and gay men tell me why they've entertained Race Play and why some of them never will …
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How I Feel About Race Play
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(Re-run) Race Play is a type of BDSM play that dips into racial fetishism and objectification in the way other types of play often dip into other problematic things that are very much a real part of our daily lives. I try not to kink shame, but race play is rarely consensually presented to me as a black trans woman so naturally, I've got opinions a…
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[Call-in Show] DFAB NB Folks and Trans Men Discuss Dating Straight Men And Lesbians
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Last week I discussed my complex experiences with men who read me as a DFAB NB person who were really disappointed when they discovered that I didn't have the "right parts". The collateral damage of a man with fairly heteronormative sexual interests rebranding themselves as some shade of queer lead me to have a deeper conversation about DFAB NB fol…
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Straight Men Who Rebrand Themselves To Date Nonbinary DFAB Folks
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One of the most fascinating issues I've had with dating in this new consciousness around gender is that some heterosexual men have stopped understanding that "transgender woman" doesn't mean "non binary person who was designated female at birth". In this podcast, I tell two stories that reach the same conclusion: that some heterosexual men have sta…
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[Call-in Show] Submissives Tell Their Bad Dom Stories + A Domme Discusses Her Mistakes
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in this call in show, several different people tell me their stories of the negative experiences they've had with Dominants. A Domme also decides to call in and share her experience being a less than stellar dominant. Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/katblaque…
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Getting Confronted By A Dom At A Dungeon...
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This week's theme is shitty Dom stories and boy do I have one for ya! Support the show If you enjoy the podcast, help support it by joining my Patreon: http://www.patreon.com/katblaqueKat Blaque
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[Call-in Show] Black Women Discuss The Whiteness of the BDSM Community
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In this episode, Black Women call in and give me their perspective on the palpable whiteness of the BDSM community. Using my story of the white rope artist who tokenized a woman of color in a photoshoot, we discuss the many nuances of being one of the few black women in a BDSM space. From race play fetishism to the obvious preference of many domina…
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The Whiteness of BDSM Media + Tokenism
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A few weeks ago, a popular rope artist who predominately does rope on white women, posted a picture of a WOC who bottomed for them and in the process tokenized them in a way that made them feel uncomfortable. They didn't consent to being the token in their feed and in the process of trying to show off for doing rope (finally) on a WOC, they managed…
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[Call-In Show] Tokens Discuss the Pain of Being Tokenized
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As discussed last week, being tokenized sucks pretty hard, but it's something a lot of us have done and had done to us many times throughout life. In this episode, we have a gay man call in about being the gay bestie to a woman dating a homophobe, a lesbian who was tokenized by her not quite out ex gf, a black woman who let white cosmetologists do …
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I used to tell people that if they're curious about an experience outside of their own, they should befriend people of said experience. I regret that advice as I start to reintegrate into society, I'm having experiences with being tokenized. One stood out to me as quite painful as their desire for social media performance was starkly contradicted b…
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[Call-in Show] Former "Unicorns" Discuss Being Hunted By Predatory Couples
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"Unicorn Hunting" is a term reserved for predatory couples who seek out, often, but not always, bisexual women who are interested in participating in a threesome with a man and a woman in a relationship. There's nothing wrong with wanting a threesome, but more often than not, unicorn hunters manipulate women into sexual situations they wouldn't con…
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The Episode About Unicorn Hunters
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A "unicorn" is (generally) a bisexual woman, open to having a sexual relationship with, (generally) a heterosexual couple with a bisexual or bi curious woman. A woman who will magically be attracted to both parties and is open to exploring sexually with both. This is an incredibly popular fantasy, but, as you can imagine, often doesn't reflect real…
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[Call-in Show] Polyamorous and Monogamous Folks Discuss Polyflexibility/Ambiamory
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Some folks are polyamorous, some folks are monogamous and some people are somewhere on the spectrum. As a polyamorous person, I identify myself as polyamorous because of my aversion to monogamy, but everyone has their own perspective and that's what this discussion is about. From a gay pup player discussing his own self discovery of polyamory to a …
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Does Being "Open To Monogamy" Mean You're Just Monogamous?
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Years ago, I ended a monogamous relationship with a person I loved more than anything so that I could live more happily and honestly. Because of that, I have a hard time understanding people who claim to be "ambiamorous" or "polyflexible". People use these terms to express that they are open to monogamy AND polyamory, but for me it's very hard for …
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[Call-in Show] Actual Pride Attendees Discuss Kink At Pride
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The "kink at pride" discourse happens every single year often between people who don't actively go to Gay Pride. So I thought I'd open up to lines to actual Pride Attendees to discuss their feelings. We speak to sex workers, asexual folks, trans men and gay men who've been goin to pride for decades. We speak to people who agree and disagree and the…
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[Call-in Show] Are Down-Low Men Cowards?
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THIS BREW IS GOOD. A super diverse array of perspectives on this topic. We hear from a trans woman currently stuck in a relationship with a DL man, we hear from a non binary person who once struggled to date trans women because of their own internalized transphobia, we hear from a woman who recently discovered her partner is trans attracted and on …
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Should Kink Be At Pride?
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Every time around this year, we have this debate about Kink at Pride. When I say "we", I guess I mean the acronym. Even though I don't entirely feel I'm part of the acronym, even if I am on paper, I felt I'd share my perspective as an active BDSMer who has fairly strong opinions about when BDSM is appropriate and inappropriate. To me, consent is at…
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Are "Down-Low" Men Cowards?
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During a previous stream, a commenter posed a very interesting question: Why are "Down-Low" men cowards for not claiming Trans Women, but Trans Women aren't cowards for not always revealing that they are transgender. Bot scenarios are about survival and the ability for a person to be taken with dignity and respect. However, in this episode, I push …
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[Call-in Show] Bi Men Discuss "Straight Passing Privilege"
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So, I decided to open up the lines to bisexual men, who were the target of some of my frustrations, to discuss the topic of whether or not bisexual folks have so-called "straight passing privilege". We had a fascination conversation about privilege, social ineptitude and the biphobia bi men experience when they share their sexuality with their part…
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[Call-in Show] Bi Women and DFAB NBs Discuss "Straight Passing Privilege"
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After recognizing that this conversation is felt very differently bi bisexual folks of different genders, I decided to split my call-in show up and specifically have conversations with folks who were designated female at birth, who react quite differently to this conversation. In this call-in show, we have some really amazing conversations about ho…
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[Call-in Show] Lindsay Ellis Discusses Bisexual Folks w/ "Straight Passing Privilege"
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This is part 1 of the 3 part True Tea Call-In show for the episode, "Do Bisexual People Have Straight Passing Privilege", a conversation that started when Lindsay Ellis' old blogs about her own feelings about her bisexuality resurfaced. In this segment, I quickly go over my own feelings on the matter and then Lindsay Ellis herself calls in to discu…
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