Jo & Caroline - When the Search Ends

Adopt Perspective

For some adopted people the search for their biological parents ends at a gravestone. This abrupt ending can create an overwhelming sense of grief and sadness made worse by a lack of answers and a profound sense of guilt for a search left too long. Sometimes our search leads us not to a gravestone, but to complex family dynamics or severed family relationships that can make it challenging to learn about and connect with our biological roots. Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander organisations such as Link Up have a process for these cases, known appropriately as a “Graveside Reunion”. These special types of reunions allow the returning child to grieve the loss of their parent (or in some cases, child) while at the same time being given the opportunity to reconnect with their extended family, community, and country.

Today, Jo & Caroline discuss what the broader adoptee community can learn from this to allow graveside endings to become reunions that comfort grief and loss with connection and being part of something larger and more grounded than that one relationship. Jo recently had her own graveside experience in Sydney and talks about why she travelled south, how she planned out her experience and what she gained from it.

This episode discusses adult themes and listener discretion is advised. For more information go to http://www.jigsawqueensland.com/episode-notes

Your host is Dr Jo-Ann Sparrow - President of Jigsaw Queensland (www.jigsawqueensland.com)

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We acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we work and the many lands that our clients now live on and we wish to acknowledge and show our respects to Elders past and present for their continuing connection to culture and the contributions they make to community. We acknowledge how much we have to learn from them and their unique understanding of connection and adoption and their recognition that at the base of every change is truth telling and healing.