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Best Ways to Understand Your Reoccuring Regret and Shame
Manage episode 384227858 series 2838668
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Shame has a tendency to come up a lot in our everyday lives, but so few of us actually recognize it as internalized shame or guilt. For example, we might not want to show up publicly on social media; even if it’s for a good cause like in support of a friend, your personal brand, or charity. We feel icky to even be posting. This is a form of shame that can be much more hidden and subtle.
What’s the difference between regret and shame? Regret can be very powerful. There can be grief involved over missed opportunities or not knowing what you know now. We experience regret when it’s over something we’ve done or failed to do. There are no ‘redos’ when it comes to regret. Once the event has passed, it has passed and we can’t go back to fix it. This ‘lack of action’ on our part continues to haunt us.
Shame is a deep-rooted sense of unworthiness. We experience shame when our own personal values are not being held to our standards. We also experience shame when we believe at the core there is something fundamentally wrong with ourselves. Shame often tracks to early childhood, but it doesn’t always start there. Shame can develop in adulthood as well. Shame gradually chips at our own self-esteem.
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