40 - Tara Heaton talks about finding JOY in the face of a shitstorm

Sideline Sisters

Today’s guest is writer, speaker, and master storyteller, Tara Heaton. By applying over 25 years of corporate experience and almost 20 years of studying neuroscience, Tara created her platform TALK TO THE BRAIN. With her understanding of how our brains process information in today’s overstimulated world, Tara helps her clients tell better stories and communicate for greater impact. But in today’s conversation, we are going to talk about what inspired Tara’s study of neurology. In 2005, Tara’s 12-year-old daughter was struck with a rare virus. What ensued was a lifetime of seizures that have caused gradual and significant brain damage. January of next year will mark 20 years that Tara has been her daughter’s warrior, searching relentlessly to find a way to stop the seizures and restore her daughter’s life. This journey changed the trajectory of Tara’s family dynamics as well as the dream of the mother she wanted to be for her three children. Tara has never believed the old saying, everything happens for a reason. What she does believe is that we have the power to use the energy of heartache to create joy in the world. She promised her children that their suffering would not be wasted, that she would give it purpose. She keeps this promise by sharing their story, not only today with the Sideline Sisters, but through her TEDx Talk called Is Our Pleasure Killing Our Joy, and in her anticipated book, Life Minutes. Igniting Joy from the Fire of Heartache. Tara's Notes from the Sidelines: • We are a nation addicted to dopamine and the addiction is growing because the more stress, anxiety, and sh*t we face, the more our brain craves relief, reward, or escape, and the fastest way to get relief, reward, or escape is by getting dopamine. • Our brains produce oxytocin and anadamide, which minimize the dopamine craving and elevate joy. The best way to get them is through deep, rich, authentic connection. • Anadamide is the body's natural ability to make us happy with prolonged joy, unlike dopamine that's fleeting and requires more and more and more. Prolonged joy comes from nature, connection, and deep relationships, all of which elevate flow state. • Pain is undefeated. It will get us if we don't let it in. • Let yourself be seen. Stop pretending. You might lose some friends, but you'll see who the real ones are. • There's something under why people show up and act the way they do, so have compassion. • Be kind. • When pleasure stacking becomes so habitual that it's interfering with how we want to live our lives, it's a problem. • Don't try to just stop your addictive habits. Look for other habits that will fill you with flow state, anandamide, and oxytocin, that will naturally minimize the need for dopamine. • "If we can feel that heartache, then we have the power to repurpose it, put its energy out into the world." Tara's TEDx Tara's website Tara's facebook Tara's LinkedIn Cool article about amantadine The interview with DOTSIE

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