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EP160 From Fear To Elation, The 9 Emotions Of Judging And Presenting At The Societies Convention In London

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Manage episode 462017711 series 2919549
Контент предоставлен Paul Wilkinson. Весь контент подкастов, включая эпизоды, графику и описания подкастов, загружается и предоставляется непосредственно компанией Paul Wilkinson или ее партнером по платформе подкастов. Если вы считаете, что кто-то использует вашу работу, защищенную авторским правом, без вашего разрешения, вы можете выполнить процедуру, описанную здесь https://ru.player.fm/legal.

Well, it's the day after The Socieities Of Photographers Convention in London. What a blast!

Judging, laughing, making friends, presenting workshops, representing Elinchrom Lighting and Evoto Ai, learning, exploring, creating and very little sleeping! The Convention is quite something to be a part of!

In this episode, I try and explain what it feels like to be a small part of it whether judging the print competition, presenting or mixing with the trade - the various stages I pretty much always go through from fear to elation and everything in between.

Enjoy!

Cheers
P.

If you enjoy this podcast, please head over to Mastering Portrait Photography, for more articles and videos about this beautiful industry. You can also read a full transcript of this episode.

PLEASE also subscribe and leave us a review - we'd love to hear what you think!

If there are any topics, you would like to hear, have questions we could answer or would like to come and be interviewed on the podcast, please contact me at paul@paulwilkinsonphotography.co.uk.

Transcript

Introduction and Post-Convention Exhaustion

So late last night, we returned from the societies of photographers convention in London, and you can hear him. My voice. I'm exhausted. The convention is such an incredible thing. 3 4, 5 days. Of mixing with the trade running workshops, attending workshops. And one of the most important print competitions in the industry, and that is anywhere. In the world, it's been a blast. You can hear just how tired I am.

But in this episode I thought I'd battled through the fatigue and talk to what it's like to be a judge, a presenter, and a delegate. At this incredible convention firsthand. I'm Paul, and this is a slightly weary. Mastering Portrait Photography Podcast.

Well, hello, one and all. I hope you're all. Well, it's been a busy store to January.

If I'm honest. Uh, we were hectic all the way up to the convention. And even today, the day after it's all over, I've just been photographing a family.

Roles and Responsibilities at the Convention

Uh, this year at the convention, um, I was a print judge, a presenter, and an ambassador for Elinchrom Lighting. Uh, the company that I just adore using their products.

And so to everybody who I've met, everybody, I've talked to everybody who I've laughed with, shared a drink with shared an idea with. Maybe argued over print score with thank you. Thank you for making the Convention such a pleasure. However, as I was sitting on the train coming home, it struck me. That there are definitely stages stages to how you feel. When, at least in the role I have. Uh, your attending. The convention.

The Nine Stages of Convention Experience

Um, sort of like the five stages of grief, I suppose these are the nine stages that I go through each and every time I attend the convention.

It's the thought processes, it's the things that make me tick. Uh, it's how I feel. It's how I feel before is how I feel through it, doing it in this, how I feel afterwards. So let me step through them. Um, as usually when I come to the end of a judging process, I'll talk to all of the things I heard during the judging and give tips on producing. Uh, competition level prints, but I've done that so many times, this year, I just thought I go through the emotions, the various stages. Did I feel every time. Um, I attend the convention.

Stage 1: Excitement

So let's start with the obvious stage one. Excitement.

This kicks in the minute that, uh, the convention confirm. That you're going to be attending. They confirm that you're going to be running some talks. They confirm that you're going to be a judge.

Um, there's a real kick, a real thrill when that comes in. And then you start to think about what you'll do you start to, you've already had to put some ideas in, so those are going to be the titles of the talks, but you start to really plan out what that might look like, and that's six months out. We will start to put in, um, our applications for the 2026 convention in the next few months.

So you have big ideas. You clear the diary. Of course, you make sure that those dates are available. And at that stage, there is nothing more than excitement. Obviously a little bit of pressure to get some social media out and tell the world you're going, but it's all about the excitement. And then you roll up closer and closer and closer to the day.

And you're sitting on the train, heading into London, stage two.

Stage 2: Nerves

Nerves.

I don't know if everybody goes through this. But I do. I start to worry that I've got all of the kit. I need that. I've got enough of a plan of what the workshops and presentations are going to be. I start to worry about that moment you walk into a room full of people that for some reason, in my mind, I assume I'm not going to know.

Of course it's never like that, but that's how it feels. Um, also there's a really important to this year. It was a three o'clock deadline, you have to be in the judges room by three o'clock. Don't turn up. You're not judging and that's an Intuit. You have to be at the judges. Briefing. Meeting. And Terry Jones from the societies, she will talk through all of us as judges as to what she's expecting, how are we going to be. Uh, scheduled, what the runtimes are, what sort of language it's, uh, just an update and refresh on a language we're going to use how it's going to work.

And if we're not in that room, You're not judging. And of course, the bit where I get the most nervous is as I walk in now I'm an extrovert. I love being in a crowd of people, but I've always had this fear of walking into a crowded room and not knowing anyone and having to sit in a corner. Uh, sort of minding my own business, finding people to talk to not being certain of myself.

Now, luckily for me these days, I've been in the industry for so long that I know probably two thirds of the people in the room. Um, so it's not as bad as it used to be, but I used to be terrified and I'm still nervous. I'm still trepidatious. I'm still uncertain of myself. Um, but I walked in this year and of course it was just brilliant.

And that brings me on to, I think, Uh, stage number three.

Stage 3: Sense of Belonging

A sense of belonging,

a sense of being part of the family. There were so many hellos and handshakes and hugs and laughter and faces. I recognize some, I don't. I was introduced to new people. There's just this wonderful sense of coming back home.

I love the convention for that. Of all the things that it brings, I think to all photographers. There's a sense of being part of something bigger. I think there are about 50, maybe 60 judges in the room, plus the print and handlers and all of the teams around us. And it is the most incredible feeling of belonging and for the next sort of 12 hours or so, um, after the briefing, there'll be socializing some food, um, maybe have a drink with a few people.

It's a real sense of family. But then we come on to stage four.

Stage 4: Pressure of Judging

We're walking in to begin the process of judging the next morning. So this is the premier print competition in the world. So stage four is pressure.

And even though I've been doing this a long time, I've been a judge. I can't remember how many years it is now. Probably 15 years. Um, there's still this sense. Of responsibility. Because each and every print, we will see hundreds of prints. But every single print is unique to the author.

Every author has put everything they have into it. And trust me, you do not enter a print unless you think it stands a chance of winning? You might not say that to people you might say, oh, I don't know. I just thought he might try my arm, but you haven't entered a print. You haven't paid for it to be printed mounted and then the entry fees. For you not to think it stands a chance of winning.

And as a judge, you really do feel that sort of pressure. You feel the responsibility as you sit there, the print comes up and you have to go through all of the elements, the 10 elements that were giving us, given us judges. Um, Um, on which to base our assessment and ultimately a score.

And there are five judges on every panel. And these are some of the best. Photographers in the world. So if you put in a score and it comes on the screen, And you're wildly different to the other judges. Of course you feel that moment? Have I got that wrong? And there's a process for this as the challenge process. Um, and each of us know how to do it.

Each of us have our own particular way of doing it. Uh, I had to run a few challenges this year. Um, and you're looking at the scores and there was one in particular where it was quite a long way out of line with the other judges, my school was higher and I'd seen things in that image that at least based on my assessment of it, my experience warranted a higher score. And every judge by the way has had exactly this happened to them.

This is not just me. But I'm sitting there looking at the scores and I'm thinking. How hard have I got to work to try and get the other judges to see what I see, to feel what I feel, to evaluate the image in a similar way to me, or at least come closer to where I am. And these are photographers that some of them I've never met before.

Some of whom I have met before everyone has their own style and their own way, but you then have to talk to the image and talk to the other judges. And see if you can convince them. That possibly there are things in the image that this time round, they may have missed that you, um, have seen. It goes the other way as well, by the way.

So if somebody else puts in a score and minds lower. The same process will happen. But now it's me trying to listen, trying to understand where maybe I've missed some key factors in an image and that's particularly important when images come up, that aren't in your wheelhouse things that you don't specialize in when it comes to portraiture and weddings, or maybe photographing dogs. I of course know what I'm looking at.

I understand that process really well. That doesn't mean I will always have seen everything, but it does mean that probably I'm in the right ballpark, but sometimes you get an image that challenges you tries, you tests you, it forces you to think in a different way. And while I might understand the print process, I'll understand the creation process, I'll understand the presentation, there may be things about that moment or about that imagery or about that style of photography that I might have missed. And so I'm eagerly listening to the other judges to see if it's something where I've just mostly get my score a little bit out and I need to be. Um, come a little bit closer to the overall score that's been, uh, the first round score that's been calculated or maybe just maybe I'll hold my ground and say no. I hear you. I understand what you're saying completely, I just feel for these reasons I've got my score about, right.

So can you imagine the pressure when you raise a challenge or you're involved in a challenge with really well-known photographers from all corners of the world, um, the pressure is immense. It really is at that moment, the most important job in the world. And on top of that, we've got a live audience.

So it's not even just that you're having to do. Um, or having to think on your feet and figure out your scoring, but you also then have to articulate that in a way that is clear. It's polite. It's respectful to the print, new author and the rest of your judges, but it's also educational, interesting entertaining, maybe because to hold an audience in the room, as judges we have, not just the responsibility. Of creating the right scores or appropriate scores for the images and bear in mind. Bear in mind, if you have a different judge on a different day, the chances are you going to get a slightly different score?

So don't think that these are absolute objective. We feel all the time, the pressure of that. But during that process, we are also for the people in the room, entertainment. With air to be interesting, as well as educational we're there to help them understand, but also for them not to be asleep. In the room, the rooms are pretty dark because of course we've got the prince lit at the front. Um, We have a microphone, but our backs are to the audience.

And somehow we have to be not only knowledgeable and skilled and respectful, but also to a degree entertaining. There's a lot of pressure on it. And it's not just the pressure of judging the prints because of course. Um, for me and most of the judges. I was also running two workshops or two masterclasses, and doing presentations on the Ellen Crum lighting stage.

So during the rest of the convention, even once the judging is done. I'm still feeling a huge amount of pressure to be the very best I can be to represent Elinchrom and the brand, to the best of my ability. And again, that's part education, but mostly entertainment. If you're stood on the stage, creating pictures, it's not really about the technicals, that techniques, that care moonlighting modifies.

It's really about being interesting and entertaining and giving people things. To go home and try themselves. And the workshops are almost exactly the same, just on a much longer format. So you really do feel the pressure to make sure everything's working, and when the audience are in there, that you give the very, very best of yourself.

Even yesterday, I had what we euphamistically called the graveyard shift, which is the last set of presentations, not just of the day, but of the whole convention. The trade show by now is closed. There's nowhere else for delegates to go, except home. And nearly everybody you speak to is like, right.

It shows done. I'm going to go catch my train. So you rock up to a room and I had, for the final session, I had the biggest workshop room. There is, um, I don't know how many people it can hold. But I was expecting two or three people to stay behind, maybe. Uh, we've got the last, uh, workshop I ran. This year was on high-key and low-key, uh, studio lighting, um, and going through the process of how you think about these things, how you evaluate. Um, the person in front of you, how you react to them, how you decide what you're going to shoot and how you then go through the stages of shooting it. I'd put together. A pretty good idea. And I assumed I'd be presenting it to two or three people who are going to brave the last trains home and stick around, even though there's a gap after the trade show, closing and the workshop starting.

Well, the room was packed. It was an absolute thrill to be there. And the last few. Minutes or hour the hour and a half of the day, with a full room and incredible model. Uh, Eloise Hare was our model and playing with these beautiful Elinchrom lights and just showing different ideas and not just with a full room, but it's a room full of people who really interactive, really engaged.

And so thankfully all that pressure I'd felt throughout the five days. Uh, dissipated in the last workshop.

Stage 5: Elation

And of course at the end of that, you get to stage five, which is elation.

And that for me, at least a sort of celebration, um, uh, almost a euphoria. Um, I've been meeting people and I'm an extrovert, so being around people really recharges me. I've been talking sharp. I've been talking photography. I've been talking lighting. I've been catching up with people's businesses. And we've been creating images and I've just been feeling like I'm at home. These are my people. Every minute of every day, it's just a sense of recharging.

It's a sense of, um, joy and conversation. It has been absolutely brilliant. And that's that sense of elation and you close everything down. You finished your last presentation, you put everything into its bags and then you get to stage six, which for me.

Stage 6: Regret and Insecurity

Is sort of, I've called it regret. It's a sort of insecurity, a paranoia.

That's always been with me. I've never got rid of it, which is where I panic about all the things I've said that possibly I shouldn't have. The people I wished I'd had a chance to say hello to, but I only waived. Waved over a room. Um, You know, there are always people at the convention. I just would, I went there thinking I'm definitely going to see them.

And the closest I got was to wave at them across a bar maybe. And I regret not having had enough time to see everybody, but that isn't enough time to see everything or everybody. I regret that maybe. I didn't give the best to me. I've given everything I can every single moment, but there's still that slight insecurity that maybe I didn't quite get to everyone. And maybe of course my scores of the images were off.

Now, of course, when you're judging. You have a panel of five people, um, and that's there deliberately. That's there. To stop it, any outliers, really railroading and the show. And that's really, really good. It means that even if I'm one image, I scored it. S off slightly too high, a slightly too low. Maybe there are four other judges to make sure that that doesn't really matter, but you still worry about it.

You worry about whether when, um, the chair of judges is looking at you. Uh, whether the person who created the images, looking at you, or whether the people that run the competition are looking at you, they're thinking. Oh, Wilkinson's a bit off this year. Isn't it? You worry. And that's always part of this. Sort of coming down from the, all of the energy and the adrenaline. Um, and then the fatigue and the grief regret, start to really kick in.

And that leads us on to state seven.

Stage 7: Fatigue

The fatigue, the utter tiredness.

And you can hear that. in my voice. I can hear that in my voice and it kind of speaks for itself. Um, I got home, I think at about 10 o'clock last night, I was in bed by 11 I was asleep by five past. And Sarah myself. Woke up at about 11 o'clock this morning. I don't remember being quite so tired. I was so tired.

I am still so tired. And of course today I've had a family in the studio and I've had to go back to giving a hundred percent and all that meant is now I'm even more tired. The fatigue is part of it.

And yet that's not the whole story because there's also now beginning to, to kick in a sense of stage eight, which is opportunity.

Stage 8: Opportunity

I've made new friends, some incredible friends. Um, Chris and mark in particular. Uh, really made me laugh.

If they're listening, they'll know exactly who they are. Two monumental photographers from Australia, monumental creators, monumental. Um, intellects and I've loved sitting on the panel with them and listening and learning from them. It's refreshed existing friendships. It's refreshed all old friendships. Um, we've had new ideas, new thoughts. Um, new challenges, new things to think about new ideas for creativity.

And of course, being a judge, I get a double pronged chance at that. I get to not only mix with the most knowledgeable and in pressive photographers in the world, but also to see images, competition images up close and personal from some of the greatest. Um, talent's there to the people that have entered in. Not necessarily people I never get to meet by get to see their images. And that in itself gives you new ideas and new things to test you.

Today, in my family shoot, one of the four people, it turned out through chatting with them that they heavily into steam punk. I did not know this what a brilliant idea. And she's quite keen to come and do some photography she's into cosplay, um, and steam punk. And she would like me to create some pictures for her too.

But that really is it a development of some of the images I've seen over the past four days.

And that leads me on to what I think is the final stage.

Stage 9: Energy and Optimism

And that's a sense of energy.

Now for me. I'm an extrovert. So being in this huge crowd energizes me on its own, but being in the judging, seeing these images, seeing these photographers, talking to the other, the other judges, um, just being in that space. Is energizing for me.

And there's enough energy out of the convention. Every January to last me a good six months it'll fade. Of course it'll fade. This is a tough industry, right? We all know that. 2024, I think was brutal. Um, I don't know if anybody feels the same way as me, but that's how it felt. We hit our numbers just about, um, our revenue figures, but of course, Our costs have gone up. And so we really had to battle. To, um, get the numbers in and get our clients in.

Um, 2024 is a year that I think on the whole I'm. I'm not glad it's gone. You should never, ever be glad that at the passing of time, but let's just say that 2025. Is a whole new year brand new, fresh. Um, full of opportunity, full of optimism. And the energy that I get out of the convention, having met all these incredible people will drive me for a good six months.

And that's really important. Uh, Sarah and I are about to spend. Seven weeks working for cruise company. Uh, around south America. So at the end of this month, um, we leave half the team running here. And myself and Sarah will go and, uh, travel abroad. Um, and so I need the energy. I need the optimism.

I'm going to need the drive because even though that is the opportunity of a lifetime to spend seven weeks traveling, including five days, uh, attending and working at the, um, Working on the cruise ship while it's docked at the Rio de Janeiro. Carnival is, um, just the opportunity of our lifetime. Um, but I'm going to need every bit of energy I can find because we've had to clear the diary for those seven weeks or at least reduce the amount of work in it and had to do an awful lot of work in the run up to it.

And I'll have to do an awful lot of work. Um, when we come back from it and particularly on the customer side, but also a Mastering Portrait Photography, still creating the videos and the articles. But that stage nine, is that sense? Of energy. And then before I know it, it'll be back to the sense of excitement when we're trying to, um, get our talks and our workshops booked in for next year, 2026.

Conclusion and Gratitude

So to everybody who I've met, everybody who I've talked with, everybody who I've laughed with, it has been the most incredible five days.

The first two, I was on my own. And then Sarah thankfully joined me, um, for the, the, the end of it. As no fun. Sarah being though, when we're judging, we are literally down in the basement, um, judging for from nine o'clock. I did the one day we'd judged from nine o'clock, till seven o'clock in the evening, nine in the morning to seven in the evening. Um, it was the thrill of a lifetime, not just to be judging the rounds. Um, but this year I was one of the judges I'm looking after the final, final selection, um, which is such an honor.

But it was no fun for Sarah, if she was. L on our own. Um, and so she joined me for the last, uh, few days. Um, thank you to everybody that made it such a joy, made it such a thrill. Thank you to the Societies. And of course, in particular, To Terry Jones and her team on the competition side. But everybody on the trade show, everyone at Elinchrom. Everybody who I met every delegate, every single delegate, those of you that came and were quiet.

And didn't say word those of you who came constantly ask questions. Um, all of it. Just made me laugh too. The two models I worked with. Um, to Marissa and Eloise. Thank you for just being beautiful, not just photogenic, but beautiful as souls. Um, thank you to every single one of you. And on that happy note, it's a Sunday night.

Apparently I've got some cottage pie waiting for me back at home. So I'm going to round this. round this. podcast off, and wish you all well for the coming year. And I hope. I hope. you're as energized as I am for the coming 12 months. Take it easy and whatever else be kind to yourself. Take care.

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Manage episode 462017711 series 2919549
Контент предоставлен Paul Wilkinson. Весь контент подкастов, включая эпизоды, графику и описания подкастов, загружается и предоставляется непосредственно компанией Paul Wilkinson или ее партнером по платформе подкастов. Если вы считаете, что кто-то использует вашу работу, защищенную авторским правом, без вашего разрешения, вы можете выполнить процедуру, описанную здесь https://ru.player.fm/legal.

Well, it's the day after The Socieities Of Photographers Convention in London. What a blast!

Judging, laughing, making friends, presenting workshops, representing Elinchrom Lighting and Evoto Ai, learning, exploring, creating and very little sleeping! The Convention is quite something to be a part of!

In this episode, I try and explain what it feels like to be a small part of it whether judging the print competition, presenting or mixing with the trade - the various stages I pretty much always go through from fear to elation and everything in between.

Enjoy!

Cheers
P.

If you enjoy this podcast, please head over to Mastering Portrait Photography, for more articles and videos about this beautiful industry. You can also read a full transcript of this episode.

PLEASE also subscribe and leave us a review - we'd love to hear what you think!

If there are any topics, you would like to hear, have questions we could answer or would like to come and be interviewed on the podcast, please contact me at paul@paulwilkinsonphotography.co.uk.

Transcript

Introduction and Post-Convention Exhaustion

So late last night, we returned from the societies of photographers convention in London, and you can hear him. My voice. I'm exhausted. The convention is such an incredible thing. 3 4, 5 days. Of mixing with the trade running workshops, attending workshops. And one of the most important print competitions in the industry, and that is anywhere. In the world, it's been a blast. You can hear just how tired I am.

But in this episode I thought I'd battled through the fatigue and talk to what it's like to be a judge, a presenter, and a delegate. At this incredible convention firsthand. I'm Paul, and this is a slightly weary. Mastering Portrait Photography Podcast.

Well, hello, one and all. I hope you're all. Well, it's been a busy store to January.

If I'm honest. Uh, we were hectic all the way up to the convention. And even today, the day after it's all over, I've just been photographing a family.

Roles and Responsibilities at the Convention

Uh, this year at the convention, um, I was a print judge, a presenter, and an ambassador for Elinchrom Lighting. Uh, the company that I just adore using their products.

And so to everybody who I've met, everybody, I've talked to everybody who I've laughed with, shared a drink with shared an idea with. Maybe argued over print score with thank you. Thank you for making the Convention such a pleasure. However, as I was sitting on the train coming home, it struck me. That there are definitely stages stages to how you feel. When, at least in the role I have. Uh, your attending. The convention.

The Nine Stages of Convention Experience

Um, sort of like the five stages of grief, I suppose these are the nine stages that I go through each and every time I attend the convention.

It's the thought processes, it's the things that make me tick. Uh, it's how I feel. It's how I feel before is how I feel through it, doing it in this, how I feel afterwards. So let me step through them. Um, as usually when I come to the end of a judging process, I'll talk to all of the things I heard during the judging and give tips on producing. Uh, competition level prints, but I've done that so many times, this year, I just thought I go through the emotions, the various stages. Did I feel every time. Um, I attend the convention.

Stage 1: Excitement

So let's start with the obvious stage one. Excitement.

This kicks in the minute that, uh, the convention confirm. That you're going to be attending. They confirm that you're going to be running some talks. They confirm that you're going to be a judge.

Um, there's a real kick, a real thrill when that comes in. And then you start to think about what you'll do you start to, you've already had to put some ideas in, so those are going to be the titles of the talks, but you start to really plan out what that might look like, and that's six months out. We will start to put in, um, our applications for the 2026 convention in the next few months.

So you have big ideas. You clear the diary. Of course, you make sure that those dates are available. And at that stage, there is nothing more than excitement. Obviously a little bit of pressure to get some social media out and tell the world you're going, but it's all about the excitement. And then you roll up closer and closer and closer to the day.

And you're sitting on the train, heading into London, stage two.

Stage 2: Nerves

Nerves.

I don't know if everybody goes through this. But I do. I start to worry that I've got all of the kit. I need that. I've got enough of a plan of what the workshops and presentations are going to be. I start to worry about that moment you walk into a room full of people that for some reason, in my mind, I assume I'm not going to know.

Of course it's never like that, but that's how it feels. Um, also there's a really important to this year. It was a three o'clock deadline, you have to be in the judges room by three o'clock. Don't turn up. You're not judging and that's an Intuit. You have to be at the judges. Briefing. Meeting. And Terry Jones from the societies, she will talk through all of us as judges as to what she's expecting, how are we going to be. Uh, scheduled, what the runtimes are, what sort of language it's, uh, just an update and refresh on a language we're going to use how it's going to work.

And if we're not in that room, You're not judging. And of course, the bit where I get the most nervous is as I walk in now I'm an extrovert. I love being in a crowd of people, but I've always had this fear of walking into a crowded room and not knowing anyone and having to sit in a corner. Uh, sort of minding my own business, finding people to talk to not being certain of myself.

Now, luckily for me these days, I've been in the industry for so long that I know probably two thirds of the people in the room. Um, so it's not as bad as it used to be, but I used to be terrified and I'm still nervous. I'm still trepidatious. I'm still uncertain of myself. Um, but I walked in this year and of course it was just brilliant.

And that brings me on to, I think, Uh, stage number three.

Stage 3: Sense of Belonging

A sense of belonging,

a sense of being part of the family. There were so many hellos and handshakes and hugs and laughter and faces. I recognize some, I don't. I was introduced to new people. There's just this wonderful sense of coming back home.

I love the convention for that. Of all the things that it brings, I think to all photographers. There's a sense of being part of something bigger. I think there are about 50, maybe 60 judges in the room, plus the print and handlers and all of the teams around us. And it is the most incredible feeling of belonging and for the next sort of 12 hours or so, um, after the briefing, there'll be socializing some food, um, maybe have a drink with a few people.

It's a real sense of family. But then we come on to stage four.

Stage 4: Pressure of Judging

We're walking in to begin the process of judging the next morning. So this is the premier print competition in the world. So stage four is pressure.

And even though I've been doing this a long time, I've been a judge. I can't remember how many years it is now. Probably 15 years. Um, there's still this sense. Of responsibility. Because each and every print, we will see hundreds of prints. But every single print is unique to the author.

Every author has put everything they have into it. And trust me, you do not enter a print unless you think it stands a chance of winning? You might not say that to people you might say, oh, I don't know. I just thought he might try my arm, but you haven't entered a print. You haven't paid for it to be printed mounted and then the entry fees. For you not to think it stands a chance of winning.

And as a judge, you really do feel that sort of pressure. You feel the responsibility as you sit there, the print comes up and you have to go through all of the elements, the 10 elements that were giving us, given us judges. Um, Um, on which to base our assessment and ultimately a score.

And there are five judges on every panel. And these are some of the best. Photographers in the world. So if you put in a score and it comes on the screen, And you're wildly different to the other judges. Of course you feel that moment? Have I got that wrong? And there's a process for this as the challenge process. Um, and each of us know how to do it.

Each of us have our own particular way of doing it. Uh, I had to run a few challenges this year. Um, and you're looking at the scores and there was one in particular where it was quite a long way out of line with the other judges, my school was higher and I'd seen things in that image that at least based on my assessment of it, my experience warranted a higher score. And every judge by the way has had exactly this happened to them.

This is not just me. But I'm sitting there looking at the scores and I'm thinking. How hard have I got to work to try and get the other judges to see what I see, to feel what I feel, to evaluate the image in a similar way to me, or at least come closer to where I am. And these are photographers that some of them I've never met before.

Some of whom I have met before everyone has their own style and their own way, but you then have to talk to the image and talk to the other judges. And see if you can convince them. That possibly there are things in the image that this time round, they may have missed that you, um, have seen. It goes the other way as well, by the way.

So if somebody else puts in a score and minds lower. The same process will happen. But now it's me trying to listen, trying to understand where maybe I've missed some key factors in an image and that's particularly important when images come up, that aren't in your wheelhouse things that you don't specialize in when it comes to portraiture and weddings, or maybe photographing dogs. I of course know what I'm looking at.

I understand that process really well. That doesn't mean I will always have seen everything, but it does mean that probably I'm in the right ballpark, but sometimes you get an image that challenges you tries, you tests you, it forces you to think in a different way. And while I might understand the print process, I'll understand the creation process, I'll understand the presentation, there may be things about that moment or about that imagery or about that style of photography that I might have missed. And so I'm eagerly listening to the other judges to see if it's something where I've just mostly get my score a little bit out and I need to be. Um, come a little bit closer to the overall score that's been, uh, the first round score that's been calculated or maybe just maybe I'll hold my ground and say no. I hear you. I understand what you're saying completely, I just feel for these reasons I've got my score about, right.

So can you imagine the pressure when you raise a challenge or you're involved in a challenge with really well-known photographers from all corners of the world, um, the pressure is immense. It really is at that moment, the most important job in the world. And on top of that, we've got a live audience.

So it's not even just that you're having to do. Um, or having to think on your feet and figure out your scoring, but you also then have to articulate that in a way that is clear. It's polite. It's respectful to the print, new author and the rest of your judges, but it's also educational, interesting entertaining, maybe because to hold an audience in the room, as judges we have, not just the responsibility. Of creating the right scores or appropriate scores for the images and bear in mind. Bear in mind, if you have a different judge on a different day, the chances are you going to get a slightly different score?

So don't think that these are absolute objective. We feel all the time, the pressure of that. But during that process, we are also for the people in the room, entertainment. With air to be interesting, as well as educational we're there to help them understand, but also for them not to be asleep. In the room, the rooms are pretty dark because of course we've got the prince lit at the front. Um, We have a microphone, but our backs are to the audience.

And somehow we have to be not only knowledgeable and skilled and respectful, but also to a degree entertaining. There's a lot of pressure on it. And it's not just the pressure of judging the prints because of course. Um, for me and most of the judges. I was also running two workshops or two masterclasses, and doing presentations on the Ellen Crum lighting stage.

So during the rest of the convention, even once the judging is done. I'm still feeling a huge amount of pressure to be the very best I can be to represent Elinchrom and the brand, to the best of my ability. And again, that's part education, but mostly entertainment. If you're stood on the stage, creating pictures, it's not really about the technicals, that techniques, that care moonlighting modifies.

It's really about being interesting and entertaining and giving people things. To go home and try themselves. And the workshops are almost exactly the same, just on a much longer format. So you really do feel the pressure to make sure everything's working, and when the audience are in there, that you give the very, very best of yourself.

Even yesterday, I had what we euphamistically called the graveyard shift, which is the last set of presentations, not just of the day, but of the whole convention. The trade show by now is closed. There's nowhere else for delegates to go, except home. And nearly everybody you speak to is like, right.

It shows done. I'm going to go catch my train. So you rock up to a room and I had, for the final session, I had the biggest workshop room. There is, um, I don't know how many people it can hold. But I was expecting two or three people to stay behind, maybe. Uh, we've got the last, uh, workshop I ran. This year was on high-key and low-key, uh, studio lighting, um, and going through the process of how you think about these things, how you evaluate. Um, the person in front of you, how you react to them, how you decide what you're going to shoot and how you then go through the stages of shooting it. I'd put together. A pretty good idea. And I assumed I'd be presenting it to two or three people who are going to brave the last trains home and stick around, even though there's a gap after the trade show, closing and the workshop starting.

Well, the room was packed. It was an absolute thrill to be there. And the last few. Minutes or hour the hour and a half of the day, with a full room and incredible model. Uh, Eloise Hare was our model and playing with these beautiful Elinchrom lights and just showing different ideas and not just with a full room, but it's a room full of people who really interactive, really engaged.

And so thankfully all that pressure I'd felt throughout the five days. Uh, dissipated in the last workshop.

Stage 5: Elation

And of course at the end of that, you get to stage five, which is elation.

And that for me, at least a sort of celebration, um, uh, almost a euphoria. Um, I've been meeting people and I'm an extrovert, so being around people really recharges me. I've been talking sharp. I've been talking photography. I've been talking lighting. I've been catching up with people's businesses. And we've been creating images and I've just been feeling like I'm at home. These are my people. Every minute of every day, it's just a sense of recharging.

It's a sense of, um, joy and conversation. It has been absolutely brilliant. And that's that sense of elation and you close everything down. You finished your last presentation, you put everything into its bags and then you get to stage six, which for me.

Stage 6: Regret and Insecurity

Is sort of, I've called it regret. It's a sort of insecurity, a paranoia.

That's always been with me. I've never got rid of it, which is where I panic about all the things I've said that possibly I shouldn't have. The people I wished I'd had a chance to say hello to, but I only waived. Waved over a room. Um, You know, there are always people at the convention. I just would, I went there thinking I'm definitely going to see them.

And the closest I got was to wave at them across a bar maybe. And I regret not having had enough time to see everybody, but that isn't enough time to see everything or everybody. I regret that maybe. I didn't give the best to me. I've given everything I can every single moment, but there's still that slight insecurity that maybe I didn't quite get to everyone. And maybe of course my scores of the images were off.

Now, of course, when you're judging. You have a panel of five people, um, and that's there deliberately. That's there. To stop it, any outliers, really railroading and the show. And that's really, really good. It means that even if I'm one image, I scored it. S off slightly too high, a slightly too low. Maybe there are four other judges to make sure that that doesn't really matter, but you still worry about it.

You worry about whether when, um, the chair of judges is looking at you. Uh, whether the person who created the images, looking at you, or whether the people that run the competition are looking at you, they're thinking. Oh, Wilkinson's a bit off this year. Isn't it? You worry. And that's always part of this. Sort of coming down from the, all of the energy and the adrenaline. Um, and then the fatigue and the grief regret, start to really kick in.

And that leads us on to state seven.

Stage 7: Fatigue

The fatigue, the utter tiredness.

And you can hear that. in my voice. I can hear that in my voice and it kind of speaks for itself. Um, I got home, I think at about 10 o'clock last night, I was in bed by 11 I was asleep by five past. And Sarah myself. Woke up at about 11 o'clock this morning. I don't remember being quite so tired. I was so tired.

I am still so tired. And of course today I've had a family in the studio and I've had to go back to giving a hundred percent and all that meant is now I'm even more tired. The fatigue is part of it.

And yet that's not the whole story because there's also now beginning to, to kick in a sense of stage eight, which is opportunity.

Stage 8: Opportunity

I've made new friends, some incredible friends. Um, Chris and mark in particular. Uh, really made me laugh.

If they're listening, they'll know exactly who they are. Two monumental photographers from Australia, monumental creators, monumental. Um, intellects and I've loved sitting on the panel with them and listening and learning from them. It's refreshed existing friendships. It's refreshed all old friendships. Um, we've had new ideas, new thoughts. Um, new challenges, new things to think about new ideas for creativity.

And of course, being a judge, I get a double pronged chance at that. I get to not only mix with the most knowledgeable and in pressive photographers in the world, but also to see images, competition images up close and personal from some of the greatest. Um, talent's there to the people that have entered in. Not necessarily people I never get to meet by get to see their images. And that in itself gives you new ideas and new things to test you.

Today, in my family shoot, one of the four people, it turned out through chatting with them that they heavily into steam punk. I did not know this what a brilliant idea. And she's quite keen to come and do some photography she's into cosplay, um, and steam punk. And she would like me to create some pictures for her too.

But that really is it a development of some of the images I've seen over the past four days.

And that leads me on to what I think is the final stage.

Stage 9: Energy and Optimism

And that's a sense of energy.

Now for me. I'm an extrovert. So being in this huge crowd energizes me on its own, but being in the judging, seeing these images, seeing these photographers, talking to the other, the other judges, um, just being in that space. Is energizing for me.

And there's enough energy out of the convention. Every January to last me a good six months it'll fade. Of course it'll fade. This is a tough industry, right? We all know that. 2024, I think was brutal. Um, I don't know if anybody feels the same way as me, but that's how it felt. We hit our numbers just about, um, our revenue figures, but of course, Our costs have gone up. And so we really had to battle. To, um, get the numbers in and get our clients in.

Um, 2024 is a year that I think on the whole I'm. I'm not glad it's gone. You should never, ever be glad that at the passing of time, but let's just say that 2025. Is a whole new year brand new, fresh. Um, full of opportunity, full of optimism. And the energy that I get out of the convention, having met all these incredible people will drive me for a good six months.

And that's really important. Uh, Sarah and I are about to spend. Seven weeks working for cruise company. Uh, around south America. So at the end of this month, um, we leave half the team running here. And myself and Sarah will go and, uh, travel abroad. Um, and so I need the energy. I need the optimism.

I'm going to need the drive because even though that is the opportunity of a lifetime to spend seven weeks traveling, including five days, uh, attending and working at the, um, Working on the cruise ship while it's docked at the Rio de Janeiro. Carnival is, um, just the opportunity of our lifetime. Um, but I'm going to need every bit of energy I can find because we've had to clear the diary for those seven weeks or at least reduce the amount of work in it and had to do an awful lot of work in the run up to it.

And I'll have to do an awful lot of work. Um, when we come back from it and particularly on the customer side, but also a Mastering Portrait Photography, still creating the videos and the articles. But that stage nine, is that sense? Of energy. And then before I know it, it'll be back to the sense of excitement when we're trying to, um, get our talks and our workshops booked in for next year, 2026.

Conclusion and Gratitude

So to everybody who I've met, everybody who I've talked with, everybody who I've laughed with, it has been the most incredible five days.

The first two, I was on my own. And then Sarah thankfully joined me, um, for the, the, the end of it. As no fun. Sarah being though, when we're judging, we are literally down in the basement, um, judging for from nine o'clock. I did the one day we'd judged from nine o'clock, till seven o'clock in the evening, nine in the morning to seven in the evening. Um, it was the thrill of a lifetime, not just to be judging the rounds. Um, but this year I was one of the judges I'm looking after the final, final selection, um, which is such an honor.

But it was no fun for Sarah, if she was. L on our own. Um, and so she joined me for the last, uh, few days. Um, thank you to everybody that made it such a joy, made it such a thrill. Thank you to the Societies. And of course, in particular, To Terry Jones and her team on the competition side. But everybody on the trade show, everyone at Elinchrom. Everybody who I met every delegate, every single delegate, those of you that came and were quiet.

And didn't say word those of you who came constantly ask questions. Um, all of it. Just made me laugh too. The two models I worked with. Um, to Marissa and Eloise. Thank you for just being beautiful, not just photogenic, but beautiful as souls. Um, thank you to every single one of you. And on that happy note, it's a Sunday night.

Apparently I've got some cottage pie waiting for me back at home. So I'm going to round this. round this. podcast off, and wish you all well for the coming year. And I hope. I hope. you're as energized as I am for the coming 12 months. Take it easy and whatever else be kind to yourself. Take care.

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