#73: Surviving Holiday Chaos: Real Stories from Stepmoms Like You

The Stepmom Side Podcast

The holidays are supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year, but for stepmoms? Let’s be real—it’s often a mix of logistical nightmares, emotional overload, and a whole lot of deep breathing. In this episode, Alicia is tackling the holiday stressors stepmoms face, straight from her Instagram broadcast channel: Stepmom Support. From co-parenting chaos to feeling like an outsider at family gatherings, we’re diving into the real struggles—and how to navigate them without losing your mind (or your holiday spirit).

Here’s what we’re covering:

1. New Schedules, New Stress:
   Many stepmoms are adjusting to new schedules in new places. Whether you’ve moved to another state or your partner’s custody schedule has shifted, trying to figure out how to make the holidays work feels like a game of Tetris no one asked to play.
2. The Planning Problem:
   The holidays fly by, and stepmoms often feel like they’re carrying the mental load of making it all happen. Add in the last-minute chaos from partners or co-parents who don’t plan ahead, and it’s no wonder so many stepmoms feel stuck trying to fit everything into an impossibly tight schedule.
3. The Flexibility Battle:
   One of the biggest complaints Alicia hears? Co-parents who are unaccommodating with their time but expect stepmoms to bend over backward for theirs. And when there’s an “older sibling who acts like a second mom,” the drama multiplies. Sound familiar?
4. The Gift-Giving Comparison Game:
   Whether it’s a competition with the ex or the kids’ expectations, many stepmoms struggle with feeling like their gifts won’t measure up. Alicia shares why this mindset happens and how to reframe the holiday gift game.
5. Sibling Tensions and Partner Inaction:
   A stressor Alicia hears about often: having stepkids and biological kids together during the holidays when they don’t get along. Worse? A partner who doesn’t step up to address the tension or hurtful behavior. We’ll talk about advocating for your kids, setting boundaries, and protecting your peace.
6. The Outsider Effect with In-Laws:
   Many stepmoms feel like their partner’s family still wishes for the “old” family dynamic, making holidays awkward or outright painful. If your in-laws treat you like a placeholder, you’re not alone—and we’ll talk about how to navigate those moments with grace and boundaries.

Resources mentioned:

• Stepmom Support Broadcast Channel
• Free Resource: 10 Tips to Get Through the Holidays
• Podcast episode: How Your Expectations Set You Up For Failure
• Podcast episode: Caught in the Middle: The Truth About Dad Guilt In Stepfamilies
• Podcast episode: Holiday Survival Guide for Stepmoms: Self-Care Strategies That Actually Work

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