Who you marry will affect you financially! I Ep 9
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00:00 Intro Welcome to Money N Matterz Podcast, I am your host Yasmine Belle, coming to you with over 20 years as a corporate tax Accountant and Financial Controller. My passion as a financial relationship coach is empowering women and couples igniting the desire for an intimate relationship with their money. In this podcast, we create a safe space discussing all things Money N Matterz while we curate strategic money moves to build an electric life both, personally and professionally. Decide today, if you are the driver of your financial life, and are ready to turn your money situation-ship into a relationship? Now, let's ignite the CEO in you! 00:52 Title Today’s topic is a delicious one, as it covers" who you marry" will affect you Financially 01:04 Content We have all heard by now that the number 1 reason for divorce in the United States is finance! Why is that? Well, let’s, deep-dive, into it, and peel the layers. Why are divorce rates at a sky-high? Could it be the famous “the Conscious Uncoupling”? Well, money matterz play a large component if not he number 1 factor in the “D” word… Divorce! 01:30 I have personally seen the financial miscommunication happen over and over, and let me tell you... the struggle is real. Wouldn’t a simple fixer-roo to this madness be held by communication? Compassion and honesty? 01:47 Well if it was that easy, Finance wouldn’t be named as the number one cause for couple splits. Do you agree with me that in order to change the world, or make the world a better place, the change must occur in us first? Looking at our current world, society, it is really the making of us. It is our conditioning that is extended to our family, friends, universe, world and energy. 02:19 Miguel de Cervantes said it best: "Never stand begging for that which you have the power to earn" Now, taking finance and money, wouldn’t be prudent to have the conversation with ourselves first, before communicating our needs and wants with our partner? 02:36 Well, if we really want to understand our current money situationship, we need to dive deep into the world of the inner-child. Yes, childhood. 02:47 Here are a few pondering questions to get started: How were you raised around money? Was it taboo to talk about in your family growing up? How did you see your parents spend money? Who was the provider in your family? Which parent did you take to more growing up? Who in your opinion was the saver and/ or spender in your family? Did your parents have the same spending habits? Which habits did you pick up on growing up that you can identify as your current spending habit? 03:26 All these questions steam from really understanding ourselves, but in order to do that, we must tap into the past so that we can outline the good and not so good habits we picked up on from our environment as a child. Growing up, In our family, my father was the money maker and my mom was definitely the spender. Mom took care of the household, needs, staff, food, etc… My father, on the other hand, took care of all the money matterz, bills, growing businesses, travel plans, etc... And, money wasn't discussed in our family. It wasn’t because it was taboo to bring it up, but it was assumed my parents had everything under control and as children - no need to worry. 04:13 So fast forward… this leads us to today… as a working adult, with big dreams and leaving behind a history of money management and lack thereof. So the question is how can we financially be savvy if we have no good role-model to mentor us? Or learn to communicate effectively? How can we have a healthy relationship with our money if we have made some bad choices in the past/ and possibly still do? 04:43 How can we change the timidity around money to have an open relationship discussing issues with our girlfriends, our parents, and even our partners? So the buck stops here — this is where we need to make a “conscious decision” together to teach our children, our friends, our community, and our family "the truth about money". 05:07 Ok, but how do we know if we should invest, save, spend not spend, or stash the cash underneath the mattress?? 05:17 Furthermore, unfortunately, basic personal finance is less likely to be taught in school or in most household. Therefore, we must take charge and turn the old into the new, and educate ourselves and each other. It starts with us - In the age of information, knowledge is a choice. Decide today if you are a passenger or driver of your financial life. 05:41 Surprisingly, if finance is the number one cause for divorce, then in order to understand each other, we must understand ourselves first. 05:53 Today, I am challenging you, to take control of your financial life otherwise it will control you. Know your money habits in/out… You can ask yourself these fundamental questions to guide you, and write them out in your money journal. 06:06
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- Do you care about money?
- What does money represent to you?
- What did you learn about money?
- How does money make you feel? Safe? Secure? Pleasures?
- If you could do anything with money what would it be?
- How were you raised around money?
- What habits have you picked up along the way, where are able to do better?
- What habits have you picked up that are beneficial towards your money matterz?
- Do you save?
- What is your savings plan for the next 90 days? 12 months? 3 years? 5 years? And 10 years?
- What are things that matter to you save for?
- Would you mind walking me through your financial process? So that I can manage my own better?
- Would you mind giving me advice on where I can maximize my savings?
- Would you be open to sharing a joint account for all our monthly home expenses and bills? So we can track it together?
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